A Toolkit for Creating the Perfect Morning Routine

(01:11):

And if your friend Mel Robbins can go from 800 grand in debt just 14 years ago to slaying it in business as a self-taught entrepreneur, you better damn well believe you can too. And for those of you that are brand new, I just want to say welcome. I'm Mel, I'm a New York Times bestselling author. I'm one of the most trusted experts in the world on behavior change and motivation. And I got my expertise the hard way by screwing up my own life and career. And so what I'm going to teach today is really the sweet spot of why I do anything that I do. And it's because I believe there are simple things that you can do that'll help you create a better life, whatever a better life means to you. And so today we're going to talk about the topic of morning routines.

 

(02:03):

And I love my morning routine so much. I call it the million dollar morning because it is in fact the morning routine that makes me feel like a million bucks. It gives me laser focus, it helps me make progress, and it is the structure and foundation upon which I chip away at my goals and I stay consistent and I have built the business and continue to build the business that I have built. And I'm getting a lot of questions about that. And so I decided we need to talk about morning routines. Now, if you're a big fan of the podcast, then you know that we have already done an entire episode about the one hack that I use to make this incredible routine stick, right? It's like super important hack. And that hack in case you're brand new is that your morning routine begins the night before because your evening routine and how you wind down the day, the simple series of things that you do every single evening, it's either going to make your mornings harder or easier.

 

(03:10):

And so after you listen to this, if you have not listened to that episode, make sure you do because it really is sort of a companion to this. It doesn't matter which order you listen to them in, but you need to bookend this change. And so today we're going to focus on the components of a million dollar morning routine. And these are all based on research. And the thing I want you to think about is this, I really believe in something called behavioral activation therapy

(04:02):

And look, I know you have a vision for yourself. There is a version of you that you hold in your heart and in your mind that you see that is a better version of the person than you are right now. The you that has a better, more fulfilling job or career, the you that is truly enjoying a deeper connection in your relationship or marriage, the you that has better eating habits, better physical habits, the you that really is experiencing a better connection to the meaning and purpose in your life, that life that you envision, you're capable of achieving it. You can do the work to make that version of yourself a reality, but it's not going to happen out of thin air. You got to put in the work. And I personally believe that that work begins first thing in the morning, that every single morning you can wake up and experience a clean slate.

 

(05:03):

You can wake up and you can create a morning routine, not that the you right now likes, but the morning routine that the future you needs. And the bottom line is whether you consider yourself to be a morning person or not, a morning routine is essential. A morning routine is like the first domino. Let's just agree that every single day of your life, you wake up and you have the opportunity to create a new experience in your life. And that first series of decisions that you make, which are basically your morning routine, it's like the beginning domino that falls. And if your morning routine sucks, like my RO routine used to suck, the first domino that falls in your day is procrastination, stress, anxiety, depression, suckiness. And that tends to trigger a whole lot more of that. Now, let's talk about the other option. Have you ever had a morning where you rolled out of bed because you had to be somewhere, you actually met a friend at the gym, and the exercise class was not only not that bad, it was kind of fun, and you felt really energized and proud of yourself for going, and you were set up for the meeting that you had, you were prepared.

 

(06:35):

What's it like when that domino falls? It feels good, doesn't it? It makes you feel confident and alive and proud of yourself. It kind of creates this energy and this motion in your life. And that brings me to a simple statement. The solution to almost all the problems in your life is your morning routine. If you were to get serious about creating a morning routine that makes you feel like a million bucks, that sets you up with the structure and momentum and positive choices that act like a domino that send you into your day feeling like you have started the day off with a bang, checking the right boxes, getting it done, feeling proud, putting yourself first. Imagine how the rest of your day flows. You see how you set your day up is how it ends up. Say it again. How you set your day up is how it ends up.

 

(07:37):

And if you are serious about making more money or making change stick or getting things done or just feeling happier or finally learning how to put yourself on the list, let's get laser focused on your morning routine. Because when you get laser focused on your morning routine and setting yourself up for success from the get go, it's pretty amazing what flows from there. And so before we get into the components of my million dollar morning, I want to tell you about the old Mel. And for those of you that listened to the episode that we did about how to create an evening routine that truly

(09:22):

There are people around the world that died in the middle of their sleep last night. They didn't get another day, but you my friend, you got another day. And instead of waking up, getting up, making the most of the next 24 hours of your life, you know what the old Mel Robbins used to do? Hitting the snooze button is procrastination in its biggest form,

 

(09:54):

But you're not procrastinating on a paper. You're not procrastinating on a project. You're not procrastinating on a call or a, you're procrastinating on your fucking life. You're basically going, the first decision I'm going to make today in this miraculous thing called life is to not do it. I'm just going to avoid it altogether. I have the option to make the most of this time. I have the option to put myself first. I have the option to move my body to practice mindfulness, to go outside and listen to the birds. But you know what I think I'm going to do? I think I'm going to procrastinate. I think I'm going to avoid it. I think I'm going to roll over. I think I'm going to just opt out. And for me, I can now see that since the first decision I made was to avoid doing what I needed to do, it's so fucking obvious why I was a chronic procrastinator because I began every day like that.

 

(10:56):

As you hit the snooze button and you avoid facing your life and you avoid facing the day, you're not feeling confident, you're not feeling energized, you're not feeling in control and empowered. You are basically embodying your excuses, your fears, your anxiety, your frustration, your fatigue. It all begins with the decision you make first thing in the morning. I believe that. And the reason why I'm being overly dramatic about this is because one of my biggest problems in life is that I avoided the hard stuff. I had a million reasons why I couldn't fix things or get a new job or pay off my bills or why I couldn't make things better or why my husband was to blame. And so if you're sick of your excuses, if you're sick of snoozing on your dreams, if you are sick and tired of letting procrastination and doubt and overthinking and anxiety run your life, let's talk about your fucking morning routine because let me tell you what the life of a chronic snooze button person looks like.

 

(12:03):

It begins in the morning. You hit the snooze button four or five times. That was me. I'd stare at the ceiling, think about my problem, snooze, snooze, snooze, and the rest of the day, guess what else I was doing? Snooze, snooze, snooze on the problems, avoiding the phone call I needed to make. That's hitting the snooze button on that, avoiding the networking I needed to do. That's hitting the snooze button there, avoiding the hard conversation I needed to have. That's hitting the snooze button there, blowing off the gym another snooze button. It's not just about how you wake up, it's how you wake up, how you set up the day. That's how it ends up the snooze button. That is just one example of the series of disastrous choices I would make for myself. Whether it was hitting the snooze button five or six times, waking up late, not giving myself enough time, skipping breakfast, never having time to exercise, never being organized about anything.

 

(12:58):

It was just honestly a nightmare. And I always say, you are one decision away from a different life. And one of the things that has changed my life is deciding that I didn't want to do that anymore. That hitting the snooze button every single morning was not going to help me change my life. So when I finally got serious about first getting out of bed, and then secondly, creating a small series of promises that I make and keep to myself every single morning, it was a game changer. Before we get into the components of this simple morning routine, that honest to goodness, I mean it's been such a game changer for me, is I also want to address something. You're getting to know me. And as somebody who has struggled with childhood trauma and anxiety, I also have come to realize how profound of an act it can be sometimes to just get out of bed.

 

(14:07):

And I will share from personal experience with you that winning the battle first thing in the morning, to not succumb to the feelings of anxiety, to not let the heaviness of depression or overwhelm pin me to the bed, learning how to just roll through a simple series of promises that create structure and momentum, particularly on those mornings when I am not feeling it. It's a game changer because there will be many mornings when you wake up where you're not going to be feeling it. There are going to be lots of periods in your life where your anxiety may spike or you're struggling with grief or depression. And being able to come back to this simple morning routine, it's almost like a way to create guardrails on the road of your life that these are simple things that you know can rely on so that you feel like yourself no matter what's going on within you or around you.

 

(15:14):

And when I start to think about my morning routine, not in the lane of we're in the military or I'm a Navy seal, or I'm training for a marathoner, this is what billionaires do, which is one of our most popular YouTube titles. It's not even my title. Somebody took a bunch of my videos and mashed it up into something and was like the morning routine of billionaires. But when you think more about your morning routine, it's just a simple series of promises that make you you that no matter where you are, no matter what you're going through, that these simple series of promises are things that you do every day to start your day, to take care of yourself, to set yourself up, to get the ball rolling, to put yourself first, to tap into your energy, to boost your mood, that these simple series of promises are going to create some simple discipline in your life that you can rely on, that you know that you're the kind of person that if you say you're going to do it, you do it. That is the greater power. In a morning routine, yes, it will set your day up for success. Yes, it is the first domino to fall, but over time...

(19:53):

And sometimes feeling like a million bucks for the whole day means you got to feel like shit for about five seconds. And that's what it's going to take. And this is also about keeping promises. If you can't rely on yourself to get up when the alarm rings, how the hell are you going to rely on yourself to do the really hard stuff, to have the hard conversation, to blow off the party and work on your resume to get serious about your songwriting career or the second act that you want to create? Or finally meeting somebody who's not got so much childhood trauma that you're their therapist and not your lover. If you can't roll out of bed simply because you said you would, when the going gets really rough, you're going to bail on yourself, which is why getting up when the alarm ring matters. Now there's a second reason why. So the first reason is you're building a level of integrity. You're keeping that promise.

 

(20:54):

The second reason why I don't want you to sit there and lay in bed, and I want you to get your ass out of bed when the alarm rings is because let's just between friends talk about what we're doing is we're laying there in bed, we're looking at social media, we're indulging our anxiety, we're experiencing trauma triggers. We are riding the wave of cortisol and stress hormones that are flooding through our brain and body. We're bemoaning the hangover. We feel we're spinning negative thoughts about the day ahead or the stuff we didn't do or all the regrets we have because we can't remember what happened last night. That's what you're doing in bed, let's be honest with each other. Is that what the new you wants to do? Of course not. That's the other reason why when the alarm rings rule number one to the million dollar morning, get your ass out of bed. Why? Because you're a winner and you got no time to lay in bed like a loser like Mel Robbins used to be. And listen to that bullshit and feel those awful feelings. Get your fucking ass out of bed and get on with your day and show your body whose boss.

 

(22:02):

And don't indulge that bullshit in your mind because the longer you listen to it, the louder it's going to get. And look, I get it. Some days it's really hard. I don't give a shit. All that negative stuff is lying to you. 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. Shut it down and get your ass up. Because the fact is, if you want a new life, you're going to have to fight for it. If you want a million dollars in the bank in financial freedom, you're going to have to work for it. This stuff isn't easy, but it's simple, but you have to do it. So number one, alarm rings ass out of bed. And here's the final thing I want to talk about when it comes to this. Why are you doing this? You're doing it for you.

 

(22:50):

You see, I think for years and years and years you were getting out of bed for other people. Think about it when you were little, when would you get up? You would get up because mom was yelling at you two or dad was yelling at you two. You were getting up because you had to get to school or make the bus or get to work, or you get out of bed because you got to get the kids up, or you get your aging parents up. That ends today. Today when that alarm rings, it is a fucking wake up call. Ding, ding, ding. Your life is here and it's time for you to get up for you. So tomorrow morning, we're not waking up for somebody else. We're not laying in bed and listening to that bullshit. Because you get to make a choice. You can choose to do what you've always done, which means you're going to have what you've always had, or you can make a choice to show up as the new.

 

(23:38):

You can make a promise that you're going to not only wake up, you're going to get up for yourself, that my friend are going to become the driver of your life. And that bullshit story, I'm not a morning person. Fuck morning people. Who cares. This is not about whether or not you feel like it. This is about you building the discipline because you deserve to because that's the kind of person that you are. And let's also tell one more truth. If I needed you, you would get your ass out of bed for me. If somebody that you loved needed you to set that alarm an hour earlier because they needed a ride to the airport or they needed somebody to go to a doctor's appointment, or heck, they just needed you to be there for them, you would do it. And so today, starting today, I want you to do it for yourself. And if you can't do that, then let me tell you the science, okay? You want to know the scientific reason why...