How to Motivate Yourself (and Others) to Change Any Behavior
The Mel Robbins Podcast with Dr. Tali Sharot
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Do you want to know the secret to unlocking motivation in yourself or someone you love?
If you want to change any behavior for the better….
Or if you’ve got someone in your life (don’t we all?!) who you wish would change…
Today’s episode is for you.
You’ll learn why guilt, pressure, fear, crying, threats, and ultimatums will not help anyone change, and there’s a scientific reason why.
Then, you’ll learn the 3 very specific tactics that inspire anyone to quickly change their behavior for the better, including specific scripts that you can use with even the most stubborn people.
Teaching you today is #1 neuroscientist, Dr. Tali Sharot. She’s here to debunk the myths of behavior change and teach you how to make any change, big or small.
Dr. Sharot is a behavioral neuroscientist, professor at both University College London and MIT, and the director of the Affective Brain Lab at University College London.
Her research integrates neuroscience, behavioral economics, and psychology to study motivation and behavior change.
By the time you finish listening, you’ll know EXACTLY what to do to create any change you want.
If you liked this research-packed episode, you’ll love this episode: The #1 Neuroscientist: After Listening to This, Your Brain Will Not Be the Same.
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- Disclaimer
In this episode:
- 2:01: Do you want to learn how to change people’s opinions and behaviors?
- 2:01: Do you want to learn how to change people’s opinions and behaviors?
- 4:02: What we’re getting wrong about motivating the people we love.
- 6:28: This is what we actually should be doing before trying to change others.
- 9:19: How you are influencing people without even knowing it.
- 14:32: Why guilt, pressure, and fear will not help someone change.
- 20:05: The 3 specific tactics that will inspire anyone to change quickly.
- 23:41: How you should approach someone to make any behavior change.
- 27:59: Why is it so hard to make ourselves do what we should want to do?
- 30:50: Use this trick to get yourself to act now for future rewards.
- 34:27: How to use “progress tracking” to help someone be better with their money.
- 36:03: Dr. Tali Sharot’s favorite study on why positive feedback works.
- 41:33: The best parenting tip to get your kids to make a positive change in their life.
- 46:08: The importance of emphasizing rewards vs. punishments.
- 49:18: This is how change can enhance your well-being and increase happiness.
- 51:52: How to approach someone you love about a touchy subject.
- 54:22: How to help someone who is extremely resistant to change.
- 56:16: The science-backed ways to motivate yourself to change for good.
- 58:55: One of the most important things to keep you moving forward.
Dr. Tali Sharot:
- Dr. Sharot’s book, The Influential Mind: What the Brain Reveals About Our Power to Change Others
- Dr. Sharot’s book, Look Again: The Power of Noticing What Was Always There
- Dr. Sharot’s lab at UCL, Affective Brain Lab
- Dr. Sharot’s Affective Brain Lab, publication list
- Dr. Sharot’s Affective Brain Lab, current research highlights
- Dr. Sharot, Ted Talk
- Dr. Sharot, University College London academic profile
- Dr. Sharot, Max Planck UCL Centre for Computational Psychiatry academic profile
- Dr. Sharot, MIT profile, Affective Brain Lab MIT website
Additional resources:
- CNN: Why don’t facts matter?
- New York Times: How we make up our mind.
- Harvard Business Review: The Key to a fulfilling career? Variety.
- New York Times: Why we make bad decisions
- The British Psychological Society: Just because we are used to something, doesn’t make it okay
- New York Times: 9 obvious ways to have deeper conversations
- Harvard Business Review: What motivates employees more: rewards or punishments
- Time: 7 lessons on how to hack your own brain
- Harvard Business Review: How to actually change someone’s mind
- Harvard Business Review: A simple formula for changing our behavior
- Forbes: Keys to tangible progress: planning, execution, and proof
- New York Times: How to have better conversations about hard things
- National Library of Medicine: Appealing to fear: A Meta-Analysis of Fear Appeal Effectiveness and Theories
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